Dear Coach,

We hardly know each other, and yet very shortly we will have quite a
lot in common, namely, my son Mike. Now that your season is about to
begin, we are "loaning" you one of the greatest possessions the Good
Lord has seen fit to give us- our son, and make no mistake about it,
coach, during these next few months he is yours!

To his mother and me he is still a little boy in many respects, but of
course we wouldn't dare let him know we felt that way since he thinks
he's quite grown up at age 15. To most coaches, he and his buddies are
looked upon as young men because they have the backbone to come out for
the team and to stick with it. Little boys couldn't do this, only
"men" can take it, according to the coaches. But I guess most parents
are hesitant to want to see their sons in this light because these
youngsters seem to grow up so quickly anyway.

You know, Mike has been a hero worshipper ever since he was little more
than a baby and I'm happy to say that at one small point in his life he
even included me, but now, you are number one! In his eyes, you are
the man. He believes in you. He believes in what you do. He believes
in what you stand for and what you say. He doesn't miss a thing where
you are concerned, and most importantly he believes in what you are!
This, my friend, makes you a very special person fulfilling a very
special role, with very special responsibilities, which far outweigh
the limited message any scoreboard might tell.

Some of us have only one son to guide and enjoy, but you, coach, will
literally have hundreds of "sons" to guide and enjoy over the years.
In this respect, especially, you are a very lucky man indeed. Now, I'm
not naive enough to believe that our son and his teammates won't keep
you awake nights, make mistakes, frustrate you, lose some, win some,
and cause you other kinds of problems, but in the final analysis it
might be that this is because they are boys, not men. This might come
as a surprise to you, but in some ways these things hurt the boys more
than it hurts you since they are so anxious to please you. It might
not show, but deep down they are disappointed when these things happen
because they feel that they have let you down.

Ever since I can remember, this boy of ours has dreamed of the day when
he would have his chance to "make the team." At the moment this is his
one burning desire. He wants to be an athlete and be part of the team,
and at this time and in this place he is ready to do what you tell him
in order to accomplish this goal. As you might expect, like every boy,
he dreams of glory and of becoming a superstar who always manages to
come through when the team is on the brink of disaster! I guess this
isn't too bad, for the moment, at least, since the hard facts of life
bring us face to face with reality all too soon anyway.

Please do not misunderstand me, coach. I am not suggesting that he be
treated any differently than anyone else because I feel that basically
our boy is just like all the boys on the team. I don't know if he will
ever be good enough to "make the first team," or weather he has any
real athletic ability or not, but to us this is not our primary
concern. I believe that I speak for most parents when I say that we
are more concerned about what happens to our youngsters through this
experience and because you are his teacher. We hope that in spite of
your busy schedule you will be able to see these boys as something
other than X's and O's on a play sheet, or "tools" to be used in
furthering your ambitions for that really "big job".

We hope, too, that our boy will not only learn the fundamentals of the
game from you but also a respect for authority, the necessity of
following rules and the penalty for violating them. He needs to learn
that discipline is important to an individual and to a group in order
to prevent chaos. He needs to develop an appreciation for hard work
and the fact that this is still a good guideline for success in any
endeavor. We think he should learn that loyalty is not a bad word and
that being loyal to his team, his coach, his school, his family, his
church, and his country is good and necessary. Through athletics he
should develop an understanding of the importance of taking care of his
body and not abusing it by using tobacco, alcohol, or drugs. His
experiences with you in athletics should also teach him to accept his
fellow man for what he is and what he can do rather than the color of
his skin or his nationality. No one enjoys losing, but youngsters need
to get a taste of it in order for them to learn that the important
thing is the necessity of "getting off the floor" and trying again.
These are the little things that begin to make young men and good
citizens without sacrificing any mechanical aspects of the game.
I realize that every community has its corps of "super critics" who
only have eyes for the scoreboard. But I am suggesting to you, coach,
that if you teach "boys" instead of just a "sport" the boys and the
parents will rarely, if ever, be numbered among the leather-lunged
experts in row X and your personal scoreboard will record so many young
men out of so many boys.

Good luck to you and the team.

Sincerely,
A Father